Mood: not sure
Today was an odd day, as u was trying to grasp on what I should do or the direction I should go to try to improve of what is expected of me, I was stopped in my tracks for a few seconds. Its amazing on how one person can have a impact, this little boy who acknowledged me and remembered me by name, made me hesitate for a second and think my how charming he is and growing quickly. But yet sadness grew over me as a lot of memories came fourth of my childhood and wondering what feelings must be going on within.
I have always been one to try to live the dream, with everyday thinking of ways to change things, making up the stories in my mind to work out the way I wanted it too, I guess to cover up reality and to make it better. From that point I have always tried to be a friend to everyone, even the ones that didn’t like me for whatever reason they had was fine but even if they had to talk I would listen and open up my mind and dream of a way things could be better for them. And realize in some ways when they walked away I had gained some trust with them. Spent a lot of times encouraging the ones who were down and let them lean on me till they settled their differences and were able to move on. And yes their have been times where I have been taken advantage of but we all experience that at some point in our lives. But the hardest part is to open yourself up again to try to help another who is in need of a shoulder. Witch some of my close friends will tell you I am able to do that easily no matter how many times I get hurt in the process. But I think it was always the purpose in my life though it’s hard to get attached and to let go but it seems to help those who need it. And in the end I have ended up with a lot of friends, more than I realized, but it was most of my dreamed up outcomes that brought happiness to ones life, and maybe one day I might find mine again or maybe not but that’s the way things go in the real world but I can at least say I accomplished something and that’s all that matters and hope it will never be forgotten.